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Facebook friend request? No thank you. How about LinkedIn?

Dear colleague and Facebook friend-wannabe:


" Yes, I did in fact get your friend request. It is sitting in my email inbox while I decide what to do with it.

You see, just because we are colleagues, it does not mean that I am interested in your friend's son's birthday nor what you and your partner ate for dinner last night nor where you ate even though I am sure the photos you would share would be very enticing. Frankly, while I am very happy to exchange work pleasantries with you, don't mistake that for being deeply interested in every detail (and I do mean detail) of your life and for me wanting to include you in my social circle of family and close friends.

Consider if you will, my 'social capacity index' - my ability to have a meaningful interaction with anyone via social media. It is pretty low, and gets lower with each additional friend. I can barely keep up with my immediate family as it is, far less extended family and close friends.

I am sure you are wondering how you could have totally misread the situation? I will explain this as gently as I can. I am fully present in our 2-minute kitchen conversation in the office while I warm up my lunch, but do you remember a time when I sought you out? Or did you ever seek me out for anything unrelated to work? I thought not. That is the kind of relationship we have.

So while I am flattered that you are interested in all the significant milestones in my life as well as those of my 100 other friends;  the picture of my new pair of shoes, and the random 7-minute YouTube video I re-posted; I'm afraid that I will have to delete that friend request. Please know that even though I don't 'friend' you,  this does NOT diminish your worth as a human being. 

Don't despair, remember we are "1st connections" on LinkedIn and they are always asking that I 'Reconnect with colleagues'. 

Thank you for understanding."

LinkedIn, the LinkedIn logo, the IN logo and InMail are registered trademarks or trademarks of LinkedIn Corporation and its affiliates in the United States and/or other countries.

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