Skip to main content

Facebook friend request? No thank you. How about LinkedIn?

Dear colleague and Facebook friend-wannabe:


" Yes, I did in fact get your friend request. It is sitting in my email inbox while I decide what to do with it.

You see, just because we are colleagues, it does not mean that I am interested in your friend's son's birthday nor what you and your partner ate for dinner last night nor where you ate even though I am sure the photos you would share would be very enticing. Frankly, while I am very happy to exchange work pleasantries with you, don't mistake that for being deeply interested in every detail (and I do mean detail) of your life and for me wanting to include you in my social circle of family and close friends.

Consider if you will, my 'social capacity index' - my ability to have a meaningful interaction with anyone via social media. It is pretty low, and gets lower with each additional friend. I can barely keep up with my immediate family as it is, far less extended family and close friends.

I am sure you are wondering how you could have totally misread the situation? I will explain this as gently as I can. I am fully present in our 2-minute kitchen conversation in the office while I warm up my lunch, but do you remember a time when I sought you out? Or did you ever seek me out for anything unrelated to work? I thought not. That is the kind of relationship we have.

So while I am flattered that you are interested in all the significant milestones in my life as well as those of my 100 other friends;  the picture of my new pair of shoes, and the random 7-minute YouTube video I re-posted; I'm afraid that I will have to delete that friend request. Please know that even though I don't 'friend' you,  this does NOT diminish your worth as a human being. 

Don't despair, remember we are "1st connections" on LinkedIn and they are always asking that I 'Reconnect with colleagues'. 

Thank you for understanding."

LinkedIn, the LinkedIn logo, the IN logo and InMail are registered trademarks or trademarks of LinkedIn Corporation and its affiliates in the United States and/or other countries.

Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Fitness Photo Shoot

Fitness after stage III breast cancer Plank on ball in silhouette Why a fitness shoot? I am not a fitness model, nor am I ripped like one, but I wanted to do a fitness shoot for a few different reasons: 1. As a reminder of how far I have come At the 5-year anniversary of my diagnosis of stage III breast cancer, it seemed a good time to remind myself how far I have come since I went through the trauma of diagnosis and treatment. That no matter how low I felt at the time, I came through it. Not all my sisters made it and many are still struggling today (shout out to my IV-leagers - those living with stage IV,  EVERY DAY). 2. As a reminder of how much the body can do It is a moment for me to acknowledge that while there are things I still cannot do, there are things I could not do when I first started lifting weights, that I can do now and THAT is amazing to me. When I first started weight lifting maybe I could do shoulder presses with 7.5 lbs, now I can do more t...
16 comments
Read more

What is your 'bread & butter' conversation?

I am anxious to get back to the playgroups with my Moms group, and talk with some of the other moms because I want to know what they talk to their husbands about at the end of the day. If I were to truly tell my husband what goes on with my day? Well, the conversation would be inane and irrelevant. Gunnar: "How was your day honey?" Big smile. Me: "You know the usual. Lucas got up late this morning and was crabby because he didn't have enough time to play before breakfast and Liam pulled off my tiny earring, you know, the one I was so excited about getting because I thought he wouldn't notice it, and I could wear earrings again? Anyways, he pulled it off, and I grabbed it from him and set it down so I could deal with him appropriately, and I forgot about it, but when I went back to look for it I couldn't find it. It might have gotten wiped off the table when I was cleaning, so I spent part of the day sifting through the garbage looking for it, then I looked ...
3 comments
Read more

Job Search2: Networking etiquette..

On which I have a few ideas.  As my husband keeps telling me, I won't get a job by spending hours in front of the computer submitting applications to online job postings.  The best use of any job-seeker's time is spent talking to friends and acquaintances and letting them know that you are looking for a job and what your skills and interests are. So here is what I found tricky about networking: How hard to push?  Working parents are busy, so if I asked a friend, who is a working parent, about a position I had seen at their company, do I ask a second time? How soon after? And what if there is another position - do I talk about that too?  If that friend is very enthusiastic about getting more information for me on a post then I hear nothing, what then?  Is it realistic to think they'll get back to me?  I find it difficult to broach the topic again.  I might ask a second time but for me there is no third time. What do I trade in return? In the net...
4 comments
Read more