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The path to private school

So we've been struggling over what to do with Lucas since we feel that his needs aren't getting met in public school. I've decided that if I home-schooled, what would be missing is the diversity of perspectives that he would get in a classroom setting. I looked into co-ops but I couldn't find exactly what I was looking for. (That would have to be a whole separate post!) Regardless, it led me back to private school.

I initially put down a list of what I was hoping for in any school that Lucas attends, then tried to figure out what options could meet that criteria. The top requirement was academic rigour. He could stay in public school if there was some way to provide a channel for him to be with other children that share his interests and abilities (e.g. through a school program). We've tried to work with the school (and other parents) to get this off the ground but it hasn't gone anywhere, despite the very optimistic and enthusiastic response we got from the school back in November. If it's taking 3 months (and counting) to have a planning meeting to decide on the programs, well, as you can understand I am not exactly hopeful we will actually be able to execute anything until Lucas is in 3rd grade.

In my mind, if I extrapolate what this experience with the public school system has taught me is that despite having motivated and committed parents who are willing to get involved, they are unable to capitalize on that. How many resources could I reasonably expect to be routed to my son under those conditions? This Monday will be 2 weeks since I've requested a class observation of a 2nd grade class at my son's public school - as yet, the Vice Principal hasn't had a chance to discuss this with the Principal. Again, if it takes so much effort to get a "Yes" for a parent to observe a class, how responsive can I reasonably expect them to be if I should get any more "bright" ideas? I think for sure resources in the public school are stretched to the limit to ensure that no child is left behind (so this post isn't about anything other than the reality of my experience).

So what are some of the issues I considered with private school? First was when to spend education dollars. Is it better to spend the money early on or when he gets to high school or even university? In my mind, sooner rather than later. What I want is for him to get challenging work that is interesting for him, allows him to stretch and to develop high expectations for himself. These will shape him as he gets older. Lucas told me recently that he didn't have to correct his homework, despite finding an error. All he has to do is to do it because that is all the teacher expects.

Next, if I believe that private school (education) is better than public, is the difference worth the tuition fee? Is it worth '000s per year? Some parents I respect who are very well-informed and educated in this regard feel that it isn't. I have recently concluded that that in itself is not really the question for me. If looked at it as a fee per year, I think it would be very difficult to justify private school. The way I look at it, what we (i.e my husband) would be paying for is the sum total of Lucas' elementary education. Over the course of the years he is in private school I expect the endless possibilities to open up to him. I expect him to develop an interest in learning and excelling. Having said that, there is some amount that I feel we simply cannot or will not afford and that magic number is different for everyone. This decision is tough, who wants to spend $'000s for private school when you're already paying for public school? And you're not even sure it is the right decision? It doesn't help that neither my husband nor I were educated in the US public school system so our view is somewhat distorted, and to be honest, the private school we have looked at is a closer model to the schools that we went to.

Besides academics, I also had instilling good values in Lucas on the list. In the private school we are considering, that is part of their curriculum (yes, farming out the "values" to school). They do charity work and we expect Lucas to be fully involved in his community.

So the downsides. For sure private school will not be as ethnically or economically diverse as I would have liked, but I don't feel that he will stick out or made to feel inferior. It is a Catholic school, so there may be some religious confusion that I will have to negotiate, but frankly, in a world such as ours, I prefer to have solid opportunities for discussions with him as he is growing up. Some parents may feel that the arts/music programs at private schools may not be as rich as the offerings in public school. For me, this isn't an issue since I don't believe that is where Lucas' talents and interests lie. Although I would not like to uproot Lucas out of the school and friends he has gotten to know over the last two years, I am hopeful that he will form relationships in his new school if he moves.

So... at the end of the day, private school is ahead of public school - if only we can find the tuition fees!!

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