This parenting business is not easy, as I'm sure I've said before and definitely two heads are better than one (especially if they aren't knocking against one another). My view of my husband's parenting style is that he is too lenient and, you can imagine what he thinks of mine since I am just the opposite.
Very often, whenever Lucas wants something or asks me to do something, I always see why he can't get it or can't do it. What I've learnt from Gunnar is to always try and figure out a way to make it happen. If it means that much to him, I should at least think about it. What does that mean in practice?
Lucas wanted to have a tea party yesterday. In case you are wondering why he wanted a tea-party, all I can say is that of all the habits of mine he could have adopted, tea-drinking was it. Anyway, my first thought was 'No', Liam would want, the sugar and caffeine would get them hyped up, it would spoil their appetites for dinner. No. And then I thought some more, I could limit the amount they have, make it very milky and so what if they went to bed a little later, they are on vacation. So we decided to have our tea party with dinner.
It's not easy trying to figure out how to make something happen, when all I can see is disaster, work and stress, but the alternative is killing their spirit and enthusiasm for simple things - things that may turn out to be some of their best memories with me. I have to try.
Very often, whenever Lucas wants something or asks me to do something, I always see why he can't get it or can't do it. What I've learnt from Gunnar is to always try and figure out a way to make it happen. If it means that much to him, I should at least think about it. What does that mean in practice?
Lucas wanted to have a tea party yesterday. In case you are wondering why he wanted a tea-party, all I can say is that of all the habits of mine he could have adopted, tea-drinking was it. Anyway, my first thought was 'No', Liam would want, the sugar and caffeine would get them hyped up, it would spoil their appetites for dinner. No. And then I thought some more, I could limit the amount they have, make it very milky and so what if they went to bed a little later, they are on vacation. So we decided to have our tea party with dinner.
It's not easy trying to figure out how to make something happen, when all I can see is disaster, work and stress, but the alternative is killing their spirit and enthusiasm for simple things - things that may turn out to be some of their best memories with me. I have to try.
Comments
I liked your post about competitiveness too. Personally, I'm very glad the schools here don't rank the kids because that pressure to be "first" sucked a lot of joy out of my primary school years.