Weeks 13, 14, Cycles 4 & 5 of 12

This is a combined post, caused by much delinquency on my part and to some degree inertia. In my defense though, I started going into the office 3 days a week at least. The downside is that I don't have energy for blogging once I get home, and unfortunately, there seems to be a lot of "things" that need attention right now.

I haven't had too many pains this past week, but there is always something to manage with chemo and no two weeks seem to be exactly the same. In general I feel ok considering I am undergoing chemo (see Translations), but at times the feeling of exhaustion just overwhelms me. Two days after my chemo this week I felt my poor confused body trying to take a stand against the chemo poisons (lymph nodes seemed enlarged, tiredness, etc.).

Instead of spending too much time on the state of Me, I thought I'd share some thoughts on "What do I really mean?" or "Translations" and "The side-effects that keep on coming".

Translations

If I say I am doing "good" it really means 'While not myself, I am surprised at how normal I feel, as long as I am not climbing stairs'. Either that or I don't want to spend the time to be truthful and potentially have a follow up conversation with you.
When I say I am "fine" it really means 'I am doing fine considering I am getting chemo', not that I am fine and everything is well in my world. The reminder is that right now, I am 50%-60% functional if so much.
If I say "I have had better days", know that that means I really don't feel well at all, and offer to go and buy me hot wings or hot and sour soup.

Those pesky side effects

First off: Brain clutter. In the last few weeks the more mess there is around me, the more my brain seems to be cluttered and confused. So much so that I have been cleaning out the house, even to the point of dumping out things I have kept for years (and I don't mean 2, I mean 10). I have been cleaning with a fury that has shocked even me albeit very very slowly.
Tired, Tired, Tired. After a while, unsurprisingly, I just get tired of not being myself and not feeling well. It's more like getting fed-up. I imagine I am not so unusual in this regard. I also get tired of all the little things I have had to change (like wash fruits and vegetables extra carefully; and floss 2-3 times/day on top of brushing and then using mouthwash!)
My taste buds. Will food ever taste the same again? So I really can't taste food like I used to anymore. I know what a particular dish used to taste like, and I imagine it in my mind, and then I taste it. When I have it now, it's like some of my taste buds are missing/destroyed/don't work right, and the taste isn't the same. Needless to say food isn't so enjoyable anymore and only the strongest flavours interest me (think hot wings and medium spicy curry).

And now I have to rest. Next week will be Cycle 6 of 12, the half-way mark. I still haven't felt the side-effect that my doctor would stop the treatments for (tingling and numbness in the fingers), and I am hopeful I won't, but each cycle brings new discoveries.

Week 20, Cycles 11,12 of 12: Not Happening

This week the oncologist felt that I had done enough chemo- I was not going to get Cycle 11 and Cycle 12. I've talked before about the effects of the chemo on my fingers, but you know it is a sad situation when you knot your pyjama bottoms and then can't untie it to go to the bathroom. No more chemotherapy for me. Yay? Yes, a bit of an anti-climax, but I still get to ring the "end-of-chemo" bell and get confetti thrown on me by my chemo nurses. My doctor also had in her hand the results of my post-chemotherapy MRI and it showed that there was a reduction in the tumour, it looked less dense than before and above all it looks like the volume of the tumour decreased by about 75%. Yay to that for sure! Considering I didn't feel that anything was changing I was very happy about the result. Next on my list: surgery. She said that although my blood counts are low in some areas, she felt that if I wanted to have surgery that day, I was well enough to do it. Me? We

Talking with Lucas on climate change

This is my post for Blog Action Day . This is an annual event where bloggers everywhere in the world post about the same issue on the same day to spark discussion around an issue of global importance. This is part of a conversation I had with my 8-year old. Mama : Do you know what climate change means? Lucas : I think it means when it is like 90F and it is hot. And the change? It's when in the daytime it might be 90F and sunny and hot, and then you go inside for dinner and then right after dinner and it might have dropped to 70F Well, yes it is that in a way. That describes what is happening in your area, but when people use the term "climate change" they really mean something more global, like affecting climate around the world Have you heard of the team "global warming"? What global warming is that it is made up of CO2 (carbon dioxide) and when they burn stuff the smoke releases CO2 and it's like a blanket covering the earth and if it k

Cancer by the numbers 2 of 4: That grocery bill

This is the second "Cancer by the Numbers" post, the first was about blood counts . We have been trying to eat organic fruits and vegetables as much as we can, to reduce the pesticide levels we injest. I will publish another post about cancer and food, but for now I thought I'd share the cost of organic vs not organic based on a quick poll of my local grocery (HEB). We had cut out meat prior to my diagnosis of cancer (ever since reading The China Study ) so perhaps the decline in spending in meat is offset by the more pricey organic items! The graph below shows the increase, as a percentage of the non-organic price, that I pay for common items that I buy. While the actual dollar amounts may not be significant individually, I can tell you that I really feel it on my grocery bill when I buy blueberries! If you feel you want to buy organic, but want to spend the dollars on those items where it makes a difference, take a look at the Environmental Working

Cancer Survivor, writing about Health and Fitness as you age

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